Kuala Lumpur, or KL, as insiders might say. A city with many faces, all brought to you by the unique melting pot of several great cultures. Imagine the Malay, Chinese, Indians and Western expats celebrating life to the max… Sounds good eh!? That’s right, yet again a place that is worth spending all your savings in just a few days. And wait, there is even more good news, the pricing is exceptionally reasonable. The bad news is, you will return bankrupt anyway…

Day 1

Don’t worry about it! Fasten your seatbelt and don’t think about tomorrow. Heeeere weee gooo!! OK, arrival at KLIA (Kuala Lumpur International Airport), how’s that for a name! Please remember that we might be suffering a little time difference and just for your information; this city is hot! The good thing is, that forces us to drink as much as we can! And we’re not talking water here. Let’s just make sure we have made reservations for either The Westin hotel or the Mandarin Oriental. Both stunning hotels, just like you can only expect in the far-east.

The Westin (199, Jalan bukit bintang), a 40 something stories tall building housing not only rooms and apartments but also some of the city’s finest restaurants and even the frequently rated best club of KL: Qba. Prefer the Mandarin Oriental (Jalan ampang)? OK, now that we are here anyway, let’s start the night with a good meal so that we are fully energized when the alarm tells us it’s time to hit the road. But before that, we recommend to enjoy an aperitif in the nearby Ascott Hotel (9, Jalan pinang). This trendy bar is the right place for you to have your first cocktail of this weekend (don’t tell us you already smashed some in-flight-mini-bottles of vodka that were discretely brought to you by that beautiful stewardess!).

For now, get a hold of yourself and continue your way back to the Mandarin for a good old dinner at the hotel’s restaurant. Enjoy the luxurious life of KL’s leading luxury hotel and feel like strolling around in heaven while the beautifully dressed waitresses serve you yet again that far-beyond-delicious Asian cuisine… Huh? Is it that late already? Don’t you love time difference ! OK, get this bill, pay the (wo)man and ask the doorman to get you a taxi, you are off to the Sheraton hotel (Jalan sultan ismail)! Maybe just have a glance at this hotel or just skip the boring stuff and walk around the corner straight into Asian heritage row (Asian heritage row… yes, you are right, that is indeed the name of the street!) Why the entire street? Because the entire street is fully equiped with all kinds of bars worth a visit.

For now, we’ll go straight down the row towards The Loft (30, Jalan doraisamy). The Loft is a two-storey club that is beloved for its cosiness. The club consists of several areas that all have their unique kind of atmosphere. The good thing is that this place is hot and without a doubt you will discover plenty of fellow party-seekers so just put in the vibe and work your magic! It’s showtime! As we have enjoyed some of the great cocktails prepared by the flair bartenders we felt like something new. We’re on fire and so is this city! Off to Maison, or was it Mansion? All right, stop!! Stop the music and get yourself together!

We have got two places now think of it like in the Matrix where Neo has to choose between the Blue pill or the Red pill… Ah cut the crap let’s look at the options we’ve got. First of all, we would not be your number one hospitality tour guide if we would not come up again with yet another, extremely private members club. We’re talking about the Mansion (18, Jalan kamunting) here… If you manage to get in (which is worth an applause from our side if you succeed!) just enjoy living like a royalty or VIP and enjoy the excellent service and high quality level of this venue. This venue is home to the most beautiful people of KL and we think you would fit in there just fine! Or, if you rather get it going tonight, just to make sure that you get rid of all that energy, get your lazy-ass over to the other option we had in mind; Maison (Jalan yap ah shak). No loungy kind of stuff here, just order a few bottles of fine whisky and dance the night away! Maison is a club that deserves special attention because of its impressive interior design. We don’t really know how to put this in words but would you maybe just believe us if we tell you it’s “fucking great”? Just go and decide for yourself. The place  is definitely worth visiting as the performing DJ’s spin the best dance tracks you might find in KL, next to Maison is another club located named Zouk… Slow down! Zouk is on the agenda for tomorrow night, don’t worry my friend! For now, first things first; drink, dance, dream and go with the flow as the night is over before we even realize that we are yet partying in just another great city! Yeah!

Haven’t had enough yet? No worries, just ask the taxi-driver to hit the gas one more time and set course for the Beach Club (97 Jalan P Ramlee)! This somewhat sleazy night club, with aquaria surrounding the dance floor housing real sharks, is the spot you might want to destroy yourself even more. Just rock them bars one more time, only try not to get too wasted as you might end-up with a nice and friendly cup double D high-heeled lady boy! Well, you’re free to do whatever you feel like. Just don’t blame us for any out of the ordinary events.

Day 2

Wake up and time to get yourself on track again to prepare for another day in KL! It would be a shame (you even should be ashamed) if you would not discover all the beauty of KL that is just waiting outside for you! Finish your breakfast, lunch, brunch, whatever and get out! Stroll around the many touristy, but very nice sightseeing tours, and just make a few stops at some of the many ‘Mamak stalls’ where you will be served the best food you have ever Xperienced in your life. The Malaysian culture is all about eating. The mamak stalls are actually unpretentious, primitive squares where several stalls offer you small dishes that are all worth trying. We hope that you recovered from your hangover by the end of the day you might even deserve an hour (or two) of rest and refreshment, right? Stop walking as your feet might deserve a little rest too and take a taxi back to The Westin Hotel. Get to your room, and lay yourself down on the Heavenly bed. Make sure you either request a wake-up call at the reception desk or just force yourself not to fall asleep. We recommend the first option.

After your well-deserved rest it’s time to fresh up and go down to the second floor. We have dinner at EEST (The Westin Hotel, 199, Jalan bukit bintang). This restaurant offers you only the very best of the entire (pacific) Asian continent. A true mix of Thai, Japanese, Chinese, Vietnamese and Malaysian kitchens. As nowadays some fancy people would refer to as Fusion cooking. Whatever you want to call it, just join us for an unforgettable night with great food. Enjoy the beauty of this restaurant that is completely decorated in Zen-style. Ultra-relaxing for you after your million-hours-flight! Just order a large (read: LARGE) table with all different kinds of dims sum, sushi, nasi and everything else you feel like that night.

And yet another present for you, the first bar of the night is just two storeys down in exactly the same hotel! Meet Qba (The Westin Hotel, 199, Jalan bukit bintang), the club we mentioned earlier today where we will enjoy our perfect digestive accompanied with a real Cuban cigar! Yeah baby! Just sit and enjoy the live played Latin music and prepare for a little dance! You are getting in the mood again, right? That’s great because after a few perfectly served cocktails in Qba we’re off to Zouk (113, Jalan Ampang).

Indeed, that other great club! Many famous, internationally beloved DJ’s have performed live here in this great venue! Just get in and pay one of the waiters a nice tip while you order your own bottles of rum and whisky and be amazed of the great service you will get. Don’t get us wrong, this culture is not about taking all your money and act like slaves! No, in contrary, the people here are just so friendly that you will love them right from the moment your plane has landed. We think that is worth a few tips here and there, right? Exactly! Now, enjoy a great night of dancing and drinking your head off in Zouk before you get to sleep again.  Because we are very sorry to tell, but you might have to stay for just another night!! Hahaha. We can’t help it, you just have to stay one more day in order to fully experience the KL-life and we still have not shown every not-to-miss venue. Wait a minute, didn’t we have all this time difference stuff over here? We haven’t even got a clue what time or day it is anyway! F*ck yeah! Don’t worry about the consequences, we will make it a three-day-weekend! Anyway, for now, shut the hell up and get some sleep…

Day 3?

Don’t be afraid, we won’t kill you tonight with another night of clubbing and rock and roll drinking! We suggest you enjoy a good dinner this night in Shook restaurant (181, Jalan bukit bintang) located in the fabulous Starhill gallery. Shook is such restaurant that combines the best of both worlds which results in a well-balanced menu. Not only the menu is prepared well, also the food itself is to say at least Superb! Sit back and relax while the live pianist will please you with the finest background music just so that you can enjoy your dinner to the max! After this thrilling Xperience, take a taxi to the other side of town.

Next stop: Luna Bar (Pacific Regency Hotel, Jalan Puncak). This rooftop bar is the perfect, trendy venue to evaluate yet another great weekend while sipping chique cocktails overlooking a rooftop swimming pool and splendid views of the Petronas Towers. This venue has sexy interior, a futuristic ambiance and comfortable lounge areas. At least, for now… Shall we call it a day? Sure, sleep well and have a safe return from Heavenly Kuala Lumpur…